You Have a Nanny · Problem Solving

The conversations families put off for months

Chronic lateness. The phone. Overstepping with your parenting. A boundary that's slipping. Most families avoid these until they're angry — and then handle them badly.

By Tammy Gold, LCSW
Author of Secrets of the Nanny Whisperer (Penguin)

Tammy Gold, LCSW, MSW

Columbia University

20 years training & managing caregivers

Why avoidance makes it worse

A small issue raised early is a conversation. The same issue raised after three months of silent resentment is a confrontation, and your nanny will hear it as evidence you've been unhappy the whole time without telling them.

The goal isn't to be tough. It's to be specific, early, and collaborative — then to hold the line.

Secrets of the Nanny Whisperer by Tammy Gold, published by Penguin

FROM THE AUTHOR OF SECRETS OF THE NANNY WHISPERER

Guidance from the therapist who wrote the Penguin book on hiring a nanny

Tammy Gold, LCSW, spent years matching families with nannies before writing Secrets of the Nanny Whisperer (Penguin). Today she works beside families, and their agencies, as a neutral expert: defining the job, interviewing candidates, checking references and setting up the first 30 days.

Book an hour with Tammy — $189 → Press and media

The conversations we have scripts for

Lateness, phone use, and attention during working hours
A discipline or parenting approach that isn't yours
Scope creep — duties that quietly expanded, in either direction
Boundaries with your family, your home, and your privacy
Time off, sick days, and last-minute changes
Money: raises, guaranteed hours, and what happens when you travel
Your child's safety — when something concerns you and you need a straight answer